Holy S***

Ok for starters… I hate the freaking structure of a research paper. I liked the Crot, where I could just write and write however I wanted to and still get my point across. Reading about people who turn an adolescent thing like high school cliques into this heavily scientific, wordy, basically monotone prose is awful. AWFUL. Like it literally makes my head hurt. My own sanity in this paper is preserved by watching Mean Girls like 6 times, each time continuously laughing my ass off, and thinking that this is a funny and informative representation of what Girl World really is. And Rosalind Wiseman’s book – Queen Bees and Wannabes – it’s “educational” and interestingly written. I’m tired of trying to connect my topic in the media because NO ONE writes about it. I’ve found like one article. I mean, journal articles don’t tie a PG-13 rated teen movie (almost chick flick) to the real world. Because they’re boring. Journals are boring… and God help me for being a psych major and knowing I’ve got to read this crap for the next 8 years through grad school. I really want this paper to be interesting… if not to instruct, at least to inform. I want some snobby freshmen that had to give up her power in high school to read it – maybe even researching something of her own – and think “Oh. Maybe I was a total bitch in high school.” Maybe it’ll make those imaginary light bulbs to flick on over someone’s head. Maybe people will come to realize that popularity isn’t all it’s cracked up to be… that it’s just about power… and people who don’t have it resort to desperate measures like shooting their classmate… like the tragedy at Columbine. And maybe the girl who’s starving herself for the approval of the “popular crowd” will come to realize it’s not worth destroying herself to have a few fake friends. I went through all of this… and I know everyone else has to. I want this paper to mean something… but it’s hard for me to write in this structure to be able to do that. I know I want to end with something about how even though the media portrays these cliques – sometimes – in an over-the-top way, most of the time they lose their throne. I don’t know if I can find any legitimate evidence to back that up… but that’s what I believe.